The All Season Schmooze Summary: It’s Beyond Small Talk

By Susan RoAne, The Mingling Maven®

Yes, schmooze is everywhere in the news. I get daily google alerts when it appears in newspapers around the world. It’s Yiddish and it means easy -going, relaxed conversation. It does NOT mean “making business contacts” nor does it mean “sales success”. Can good conversation lead to both? OF COURSE! The best of business relationships starts with small talk--- the little things that begin the schmoozing --- and turns the verbal exchange into valued communication.

Some very confused people who are not familiar with the definition of schmooze misunderstand and misuse what it is as well as miss the essence. People connect to us via our common interests, experiences, issues and stories. Our words, responses and our visual /non- verbal reactions show that we are LISTENING. It starts with small talk that, with on-going interest in what your conversational partner is saying, turns into BIG TALK.

These days you can’t pick up a paper or journal and NOT read about schmoozers and people who are working the rooms of their life. We all need to do it and we must do it better. The goal is to do to so SINCERELY in order to build relationships and the trust that builds business.

The best of conversationalists read, pay attention to what is going on in their communities, companies, neighborhoods and the world. They have charm, are engaging and make us feel at ease. The next time you meet one of those special people… observe:

what they do,

what they say,

what they DON’T say

how they respond.

Watch them. You may notice that the best listeners lean in to hear better. They never look as if they are planning a grocery list or ‘waiting their turn’. These are great people to imitate which, in this case, is a sincere form of flattery.

Listen to them speak. The best conversationalists do not merely ask a barrage of questions and appear to be prying. They also share stories, insights and ideas because they do listen and like people. Be very leery of lists of questions provided by some so –called experts as “ideal ice-breakers” for small talk. Too many of the questions suggested are invasive, personal and give the impression that you have gone to the school of “Canned Conversation” ®

Remember schmooze is easy going, evenly flowing, connected conversation.

What Do I Say Next? provides a practical and thorough guide to starting, maintaining and ending connected conversation so that you schmooze and win---jobs, business and most importantly: friends.

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©2011SusanRoAne Reprint only with the permission of author susan@susanroane.com

The classic best-seller, How To Work A Room, as well as The Secrets of Savvy Networking and What Do I Say Next? and How To Create Your Own Luck are also available in local and on-line bookstores and as audiobooks. The ebook NETWORKING: Beyond the Buzzword from Time Warner is available at www.powells.com.

For more information about Susan RoAne’s results-oriented, high content presentations and coaching visit: email Susan@SusanRoAne.com or call 415 461 3915.