Conversations with the Contentious

By Susan RoAne, The Mingling Maven®

What a drag! We are in the midst of a verbal exchange with an associate, potential customer or someone in the company and we find ourselves perplexed. Can everything we have said be wrong? Did we say something so off-base that our conversation partner is rightfully offended? Did we forget everything we learned about having interesting, meaningful and fun conversations?

Whether we like it or not, we will encounter those whose company and conversation lack in warmth, wit and wisdom and who are just plain annoying. Some may say these folks ‘march to different drummers’ but I would say they are self-absorbed, lacking in grace and without communication savvy.

And there are some who LIKE being confrontational and throwing a wrench into the works. I have a cousin who actually thinks that makes for interesting conversation and did that at a tea that I hosted. That was her last invitation to be among my friends. The awful aspect is that MR. Or MS. Challenger could be our boss, a potential client or a first degree relative who spoils a family celebration.

I have heard people say that they prefer to work a room of strangers rather than attend a family event. The reason: the contentious cousin, the abrasive aunt, the unctuous uncle. And most of us know one or more of these characters.

What can we do to deal with these annoying and yes, even aggravating, beings?

©RoAne 2004

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